Flaplanbass is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, proud tortoise.

Flaplanbass created time and space five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flaplanbass, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Flaplanbass, she will turn you into a sheep.

Flaplanbass' most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Flaplanbass' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

2. Never wear coats.

3. Always obey Flaplanbass' priests.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Never look at black holes.