Bestripxin is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, compassionate frog.

Bestripxin created the planet Mars seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bestripxin, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bestripxin, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bestripxin's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Bestripxin's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no snails in a room before entering it.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Hide if five whales approach from the south.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.