Nulvegsog is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, astonishing hyena.

Nulvegsog created humanity eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Nulvegsog, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nulvegsog, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Nulvegsog's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Nulvegsog's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Nulvegsog on top of all buildings.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Never talk about planets.

5. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.