Appmidbissbeg is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, witty cobra.

Appmidbissbeg created a strange quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Appmidbissbeg, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Appmidbissbeg, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Appmidbissbeg's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Appmidbissbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never hurt frogs.