Bamxencum is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, smart elephant.

Bamxencum created everything that exists four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bamxencum, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bamxencum, he will refuse to believe in you.

Bamxencum's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Bamxencum's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not hurt snakes.