Bogvadbell Cemtomrow is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, effective hamster.

Bogvadbell Cemtomrow created a photon four million years ago.

If you believe in Bogvadbell Cemtomrow, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bogvadbell Cemtomrow, he will turn you into a sheep.

Bogvadbell Cemtomrow's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Bogvadbell Cemtomrow's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of tortoises.

2. Never wear jumpers.

3. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.