Gebjarnjad is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, quiet tapir.

Gebjarnjad created bats three million years ago.

If you believe in Gebjarnjad, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Gebjarnjad, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gebjarnjad's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Gebjarnjad's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Do not kill gulls.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never sit in the presence of horses.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.