Toffligcimnighat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, idiotic snake.

Toffligcimnighat created bats four million years ago.

If you believe in Toffligcimnighat, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Toffligcimnighat, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Toffligcimnighat's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Toffligcimnighat's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat limes.

2. You must pray to Toffligcimnighat five times a day.

3. Hide from indigo squirrels for they are unholy.

4. Toffligcimnighat loves great tits, so they must be honoured.

5. Run away if six aardvarks approach from the east.