Somzagfob is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, overgenerous swallow.

Somzagfob created Africa six billion years ago.

If you believe in Somzagfob, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Somzagfob, he will manifest in front of you.

Somzagfob's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Somzagfob's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine capybaras approach from the west.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not covet oxen.