Kapnillvigfun is a god.
It takes the form of a thin, generous mongoose.
Kapnillvigfun created a top quark two trillion years ago.
If you believe in Kapnillvigfun, it will approve.
If you do not believe in Kapnillvigfun, it will turn you into a mouse.
Kapnillvigfun's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.
Kapnillvigfun's Holy Commandments
1. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.
2. Do not wear cyan clothing.
3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.
4. Put Kapnillvigfun first in all things.
5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Kapnillvigfun on top of all buildings.