Tafgomlistgess is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, stupid beaver.

Tafgomlistgess created a charm quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Tafgomlistgess, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Tafgomlistgess, he will try to impress you with trees.

Tafgomlistgess' most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Tafgomlistgess' Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill seals.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not hurt aardvarks.

4. Run away if nine hamsters approach from the north.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.