Cartitcum is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, two-faced bee.

Cartitcum created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cartitcum, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Cartitcum, she will cry a lot.

Cartitcum's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Cartitcum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Cartitcum on top of all buildings.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cartitcum.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not hurt otters.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.