Gomlandap is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, humane squirrel.

Gomlandap created the Cigar Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gomlandap, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gomlandap, it will torture you forever.

Gomlandap's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Gomlandap's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.