Rantagyarp is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, all-knowing raccoon.

Rantagyarp created a strange quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rantagyarp, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Rantagyarp, he will strike you with lightening.

Rantagyarp's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Rantagyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never feed peanuts to dogs while wearing fawn corsets.

4. Always wear orange.

5. Do not stand on grass.