Flabrapwat is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, witless walrus.

Flabrapwat created the cosmos seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flabrapwat, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Flabrapwat, it will refuse to believe in you.

Flabrapwat's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Flabrapwat's Holy Commandments

1. Put Flabrapwat first in all things.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Swans are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never mention porpoises.

5. Never hurt cats.