Cubpodlab Wigsadsas Farnquartdim is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, thoughtless guinea pig.

Cubpodlab Wigsadsas Farnquartdim created the Cigar Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cubpodlab Wigsadsas Farnquartdim, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cubpodlab Wigsadsas Farnquartdim, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Cubpodlab Wigsadsas Farnquartdim's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Cubpodlab Wigsadsas Farnquartdim's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick snakes.

2. You must never eat aubergines.

3. Do not run in public.

4. Run away from black squirrels, for they are unholy.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.