Natveenwab is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, flying monkey.

Natveenwab created a bottom quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Natveenwab, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Natveenwab, it will turn you into a hamster.

Natveenwab's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Natveenwab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Worship no other gods but Natveenwab.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Natveenwab.

4. Never think about black holes.

5. Never sing in holy places.