Nartpig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, prudent tortoise.

Nartpig created a down quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartpig, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nartpig, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Nartpig's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Nartpig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear lead on your body.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Always treat badgers with great respect.

4. Never feed beans to grasshopers while wearing blue coats.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.