Hinwoddud is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, slow otter.

Hinwoddud created an atom seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hinwoddud, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hinwoddud, he will have a low opinion of you.

Hinwoddud's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Hinwoddud's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Respect your elders.