Quagvadcut is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, narcissistic manatee.

Quagvadcut created an atom nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Quagvadcut, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Quagvadcut, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Quagvadcut's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Quagvadcut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Moths are not to be trusted.

4. Erect a large lead sculpture of Quagvadcut on top of all buildings.

5. Always wear fawn.