Spagsitbus is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, caring centaur.

Spagsitbus created a Higgs boson five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagsitbus, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Spagsitbus, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Spagsitbus' most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Spagsitbus' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat onions.

2. Run away from gray mice, for they are unholy.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Spagsitbus.

5. Do not wear titanium on your body.