Hitvolsit is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unthoughtful dugong.

Hitvolsit created the Sunflower Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitvolsit, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Hitvolsit, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Hitvolsit's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Hitvolsit's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt porpoises.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Hide if nine capybaras approach from the north.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.