Waplitmob is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, egotistical owl.

Waplitmob created the world four billion years ago.

If you believe in Waplitmob, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Waplitmob, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Waplitmob's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Waplitmob's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear stockings.

2. Never think about nebulae.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Feed all hungry birds.

5. Always take life seriously.