Taftinrutt is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, all-powerful owl.

Taftinrutt created the Whirlpool Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Taftinrutt, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Taftinrutt, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Taftinrutt's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Taftinrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from red goats for they are unholy.

2. Never mention doves.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Taftinrutt on top of all buildings.

5. Never wear boots.