Flapwanfon is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, fast skunk.

Flapwanfon created the Sol system two billion years ago.

If you believe in Flapwanfon, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flapwanfon, he will turn you into a rat.

Flapwanfon's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Flapwanfon's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never think about asteroids.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Put Flapwanfon first in all things.

5. Do not cook food in pots.