Lidzodkab Jabsaszen is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, all-powerful slug.

Lidzodkab Jabsaszen created a Higgs boson five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lidzodkab Jabsaszen, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Lidzodkab Jabsaszen, it will not care at all.

Lidzodkab Jabsaszen's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Lidzodkab Jabsaszen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Lidzodkab Jabsaszen's name in vain.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never think about moons.