Cumbastwap is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, grumpy bear.

Cumbastwap created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumbastwap, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cumbastwap, it will turn you into a rat.

Cumbastwap's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Cumbastwap's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not shave your hands.