Jipbathan is a god.

She takes the form of a large, stupid coyote.

Jipbathan created the planet Venus eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jipbathan, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Jipbathan, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Jipbathan's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Jipbathan's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Always make sure there are no eagles in a room before entering it.

4. Jipbathan loves foxes, so they must be respected.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.