Metfobcet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, narcissistic spider.

Metfobcet created dark matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Metfobcet, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Metfobcet, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Metfobcet's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Metfobcet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Always treat capybaras with great respect.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Erect a large tin sculpture of Metfobcet on top of all buildings.