Donfodgomtar Gupcunquartfen is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, idiotic deer.

Donfodgomtar Gupcunquartfen created the solar system four million years ago.

If you believe in Donfodgomtar Gupcunquartfen, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Donfodgomtar Gupcunquartfen, it will try to impress you with trees.

Donfodgomtar Gupcunquartfen's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Donfodgomtar Gupcunquartfen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Geese are not to be trusted.

3. Never laugh in the presence of voles.

4. Do not drink water in white rooms.

5. Never go into pink rooms.