Ratquat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, omnipotent shrew.

Ratquat created the planet Saturn three million years ago.

If you believe in Ratquat, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Ratquat, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Ratquat's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Ratquat's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

2. Run away if seven tortoises approach from the south.

3. Do not dye your hair blue.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Retreat if four dogs approach from the north.