Nellkamontcepshavcapxemhak is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, temperamental fox.

Nellkamontcepshavcapxemhak created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nellkamontcepshavcapxemhak, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nellkamontcepshavcapxemhak, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Nellkamontcepshavcapxemhak's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Nellkamontcepshavcapxemhak's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in holy places.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not cook food in pots.