Gedmadhamont is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, unsympathetic spider.

Gedmadhamont created time and space six million years ago.

If you believe in Gedmadhamont, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gedmadhamont, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Gedmadhamont's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Gedmadhamont's Holy Commandments

1. Frogs are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Gedmadhamont loves seals, so they must be honoured.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.