Tiffotrot is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, temperamental troll.

Tiffotrot created Africa two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tiffotrot, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tiffotrot, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Tiffotrot's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Tiffotrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention great tits.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tiffotrot.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never go into brown rooms.

5. You must love Tiffotrot.