Pastithak is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, pitiless grasshopper.

Pastithak created parasitic wasps three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pastithak, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Pastithak, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Pastithak's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Pastithak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Never wear dresses.

5. Do not drink alcohol.