Loophomtabnak is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, dishonest fairy.

Loophomtabnak created time and space two million years ago.

If you believe in Loophomtabnak, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Loophomtabnak, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Loophomtabnak's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Loophomtabnak's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not hurt swans.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Retreat if three ants approach from the east.