Begdobfut is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, confident cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Begdobfut created viruses two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Begdobfut, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Begdobfut, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Begdobfut's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Begdobfut's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

2. Always help snails in need.

3. Feed all hungry birds.

4. Never wear shorts.

5. Do not listen to music.