Shavlegjin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, tranquil gnu.

Shavlegjin created Africa two billion years ago.

If you believe in Shavlegjin, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Shavlegjin, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Shavlegjin's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Shavlegjin's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.