Zograkmig is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, tranquil monkey.

Zograkmig created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zograkmig, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Zograkmig, she will turn you into a mole.

Zograkmig's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Zograkmig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Worship no other gods but Zograkmig.

3. Put Zograkmig first in all things.

4. Always wear orange.

5. Never laugh in the presence of squirrels.