Sugbagtif is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, blissful squirrel.

Sugbagtif created the Sun three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sugbagtif, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Sugbagtif, she will be mildly annoyed.

Sugbagtif's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Sugbagtif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. You must never eat peanuts.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Retreat if eight badgers approach from the south.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.