Cissveencuss is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, calm squid.

Cissveencuss created snails six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cissveencuss, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cissveencuss, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Cissveencuss' most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Cissveencuss' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not kill horses.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never think about black holes.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.