Flabafged is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, annoying toad.

Flabafged created a top quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Flabafged, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Flabafged, he will turn you into a slug.

Flabafged's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Flabafged's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never jump in holy places.

3. Never paint your neck indigo.

4. Always look after injured snakes.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.