Basstifcib is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, narcissistic lizard.

Basstifcib created bats four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Basstifcib, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Basstifcib, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Basstifcib's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Basstifcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never wear dresses.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never paint your back gray.

5. Do not sit in public.