Jamflabpit is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, unfair crow.

Jamflabpit created tapeworms three million years ago.

If you believe in Jamflabpit, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Jamflabpit, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Jamflabpit's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Jamflabpit's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Erect five silver sculptures of Jamflabpit on top of important buildings.

5. Do not bounce in public.