Safjoplistbep is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, astonishing chinchilla.

Safjoplistbep created the Cigar Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Safjoplistbep, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Safjoplistbep, he will turn you into a mole.

Safjoplistbep's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Safjoplistbep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

2. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

3. Do not eat peas.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not take Safjoplistbep's name in vain.