Mumlatgep is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, bad-tempered cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Mumlatgep created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Mumlatgep, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Mumlatgep, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Mumlatgep's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Mumlatgep's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Always help ducks in need.

5. Never talk about comets.