Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, strong chinchilla.

Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar created a down quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar, it will turn you into a rock.

Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear zinc on your body.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not take Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar's name in vain.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Zenhabtansteryarlgut Hugfotgar on top of all buildings.