Gidtancep is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, all-powerful monkey.

Gidtancep created the planet Mars nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidtancep, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gidtancep, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Gidtancep's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Gidtancep's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your face mauve.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never hurt tortoises.

4. Never think about galaxies.

5. Never run in the presence of capybaras.