Metzigquaf is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, confident wyrm.

Metzigquaf created Asia six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Metzigquaf, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Metzigquaf, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Metzigquaf's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Metzigquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never sit in holy places.

3. Metzigquaf loves sharks, so they must be respected.

4. Bats are not to be trusted.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.