Gesscabdossdissarpzaghimten is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, humorless centipede.

Gesscabdossdissarpzaghimten created Africa nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gesscabdossdissarpzaghimten, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gesscabdossdissarpzaghimten, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Gesscabdossdissarpzaghimten's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Gesscabdossdissarpzaghimten's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Always help pigs.

3. Do not wear white clothing.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. You must never eat apples.